“If a man entices a virgin who isn’t pledged to be married, and lies with her, he shall surely pay a dowry for her to be his wife. If her father utterly refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money according to the dowry of virgins.

A prudent daughter will inherit a husband of her own. She who brings shame is the grief of her father.

“If a man sells his daughter to be a female servant, she shall not go out as the male servants do. If she doesn’t please her master, who has married her to himself, then he shall let her be redeemed. He shall have no right to sell her to a foreign people, since he has dealt deceitfully with her. If he marries her to his son, he shall deal with her as a daughter. If he takes another wife to himself, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, and her marital rights. If he doesn’t do these three things for her, she may go free without paying any money.

The Marriage Institution

Lives of Eminent Philosophers, Book 6: The Cynics

After seeing a stupid wrestler practising as a doctor he inquired of him, "What does this mean? Is it that you may now have your revenge on the rivals who formerly beat you?" Seeing the child of a courtesan throw stones at a crowd, he cried out, "Take care you don't hit your father." A boy having shown him a dagger that he had received from an admirer, Diogenes remarked, "A pretty blade with an ugly handle." When some people commended a person who had given him a gratuity, he broke in with "You have no praise for me who was worthy to receive it." When some one asked that he might have back his cloak, "If it was a gift," replied Diogenes, "I possess it; while, if it was a loan, I am using it." A supposititious son having told him that he had gold in the pocket of his dress, "True," said he, "and therefore you sleep with it under your pillow."

And he said he marvelled that before we buy a jar or dish we try whether it rings true, but if it is a man are content merely to look at him. To Xeniades who purchased him he said, "You must obey me, although I am a slave; for, if a physician or a steersman were in slavery, he would be obeyed." Eubulus in his book entitled The Sale of Diogenes tells us that this was how he trained the sons of Xeniades. After their other studies he taught them to ride, to shoot with the bow, to sling stones and to hurl javelins. Later, when they reached the wrestling-school, he would not permit the master to give them full athletic training, but only so much as to heighten their colour and keep them in good condition.

He maintained that all things are the property of the wise, and employed such arguments as those cited above. All things belong to the gods. The gods are friends to the wise, and friends share all property in common; therefore all things are the property of the wise. Again as to law: that it is impossible for society to exist without law; for without a city no benefit can be derived from that which is civilized. But the city is civilized, and there is no advantage in law without a city; therefore law is something civilized. He would ridicule good birth and fame and all such distinctions, calling them showy ornaments of vice. The only true commonwealth was, he said, that which is as wide as the universe. He advocated community of wives, recognizing no other marriage than a union of the man who persuades with the woman who consents. And for this reason he thought sons too should be held in common.

Discourses 3.22: On the Calling of a Cynic

For see, he must show certain services to his father-in-law, to the rest of his wife's relatives, to his wife herself; finally, he is driven from his profession, to act as a nurse in his own family and to provide for them. To make a long story short, he must get a kettle to heat water for the baby, for washing it in a bath-tub; wool for his wife when she has had a child, oil, a cot, a cup (the vessels get more and more numerous); not to speak of the rest of his business, and his distraction. Where, I beseech you, is left now our king, the man who has leisure for the public interest, Who hath charge of the folk and for many a thing must be watchful? Where, pray, is this king, whose duty it is to oversee the rest of men; those who have married; those who have had children; who is treating his wife well, and who ill; who quarrels; what household is stable, and what not; making his rounds like a physician, and feeling pulses? "You have a fever, you have a headache, you have the gout. You must abstain from food, you must eat, you must give up the bath; you need the surgeon's knife, you the cautery." Where is the man who is tied down to the duties of everyday life going to find leisure for such matters? Come, doesn't he have to get little cloaks for the children? Doesn't he have to send them off to a school-teacher with their little tablets and writing implements, and little notebooks; and, besides, get the little cot ready for them? For they can't be Cynics from the moment they leave the womb. And if he doesn't do all this, it would have been better to expose them at birth, rather than to kill them in this fashion.

See to what straits we are reducing our Cynic, how we are taking away his kingdom from him.—Yes, but Crates married.—You are mentioning a particular instance which arose out of passionate love, and you are assuming a wife who is herself another Crates. But our inquiry is concerned with ordinary marriage apart from special circumstances, and from this point of view we do not find that marriage, under present conditions, is a matter of prime importance for the Cynic. How, then, said the young man, will the Cynic still be able to keep society going?—In the name of God, sir, who do mankind the greater service? Those who bring into the world some two or three ugly-snouted children to take their place, or those who exercise oversight, to the best of their ability, over all mankind, observing what they are doing, how they are spending their lives, what they are careful about, and what they undutifully neglect? And were the Thebans helped more by all those who left them children than by Epaminondas who died without offspring? And did Priam, who begot fifty sons, all rascals, or Danaus, or Aeolus, contribute more to the common weal than did Homer? What? Shall high military command or writing a book prevent a man from marrying and having children, while such a person will not be regarded as having exchanged his childlessness for naught, and yet shall the Cynic's kingship not be thought a reasonable compensation?

and the Cynic will think him worthy to receive him into his house? So if that is what you think and have in mind, you had much better look around for some nice dunghill, on which to have your fever, one that will give you shelter from the north wind, so that you won't get chilled. But you give me the impression of wanting to go into somebody's house for a while and to get filled up. Why, then, are you even laying your hand to so great an enterprise? But, said the young man, will marriage and children be undertaken by the Cynic as a matter of prime importance?—If, replied Epictetus, you grant me a city of wise men, it might very well be that no one will lightly adopt the Cynic's profession. For in whose interest would he take on this style of life? If, nevertheless, we assume that he does so act, there will be nothing to prevent him from both marrying and having children; for his wife will be another person like himself, and so will his father-in-law, and his children will be brought up in the same fashion. But in such an order of things as the present, which is like that of a battle-field, it is a question, perhaps, if the Cynic ought not to be free from distraction, wholly devoted to the service of God, free to go about among men, not tied down by the private duties of men, nor involved in relationships which he cannot violate and still maintain his role as a good and excellent man, whereas, on the other hand, if he observes them, he will destroy the messenger, the scout, the herald of the gods, that he is.

The Dhammapada

Wise people do not call that a strong fetter which is made of iron, wood, or hemp; far stronger is the care for precious stones and rings, for sons and a wife. That fetter wise people call strong which drags down, yields, but is difficult to undo; after having cut this at last, people leave the world, free from cares, and leaving desires and pleasures behind.

The fields are damaged by weeds, mankind is damaged by vanity: therefore a gift bestowed on those who are free from vanity brings great reward. The fields are damaged by weeds, mankind is damaged by lust: therefore a gift bestowed on those who are free from lust brings great reward.

Whatever a man sacrifice in this world as an offering or as an oblation for a whole year in order to gain merit, the whole of it is not worth a quarter (a farthing); reverence shown to the righteous is better. He who always greets and constantly reveres the aged, four things will increase to him, viz. life, beauty, happiness, power.

The Bhagavad Gita

This confusion draggeth to hell the slayers of the family, and the family; for their ancestors fall, deprived of rice-balls and libations. By these caste-confusing misdeeds of the slayers of the family, the everlasting caste customs and family customs are abolished. The abode of the men whose family customs are extinguished, O Janârdana, is everlastingly in hell. Thus have we heard.

Why should not we learn to turn away from such a sin, O Janârdana, who see the evils in the destruction of a family? In the destruction of a family the immemorial family traditions perish; in the perishing of tradition, lawlessness overcomes the whole family; Owing to predominance of lawlessness, O Krishna, the women of the family become corrupt; women corrupted, O Vârshneya, there ariseth caste confusion;

Having in ancient times emanated mankind together with sacrifice, the Lord of emanation said: "By this shall ye propagate; be this to you the giver of desire; "With this nourish ye the Shining Ones, and may the Shining Ones nourish you; thus nourishing one another ye shall reap the supremest good. "For, nourished by sacrifice, the Shining Ones shall bestow on you the enjoyments you desire." A thief verily is he who enjoyeth what is given by Them without returning Them aught.

Shinto Oracles

Even though men prepare for us a pure abode and offer there the rare things of the land, though they hang up offerings of the seven precious things, and with anxious hearts pray to us for hundreds of days, yet will we refuse to enter the house of the depraved and miserly. But we will surely visit the dwellings even of those in deep mourning without an invitation, if loving-kindness is there always. The reason is that we make loving-kindness our shintai. Hear all men! If you desire to obtain help from the Gods, put away pride. Even a hair of pride shuts you off from the Gods as it were by a great cloud. Hear all men! The good Kami find their strength and their support in piety. Therefore they love not the offerings of those who practise tedious ceremonies.

All ye of high and low degree, rather than pray to Heaven- and-Earth, rather than pray to all the Kami, dutifully serve your parents. For your parents are the Gods of without and within. If that which is within is not bright it is useless to pray only for that which is without

In the last days the world will be disturbed and all men troubled. The sovereign house will show respect for the military house, and local governors will make friends with wearisome fellows (Buddhist monks). Buddhist priests will take to them, wives, eat flesh, and propagate base doctrines. The land of Ashihara of the fair rice-ears is the rightful property of my descendants.

The Tao Te Ching

When the Great Tao (Way or Method) ceased to be observed, benevolence and righteousness came into vogue. (Then) appeared wisdom and shrewdness, and there ensued great hypocrisy. When harmony no longer prevailed throughout the six kinships, filial sons found their manifestation; when the states and clans fell into disorder, loyal ministers appeared.

If we could renounce our sageness and discard our wisdom, it would be better for the people a hundredfold. If we could renounce our benevolence and discard our righteousness, the people would again become filial and kindly. If we could renounce our artful contrivances and discard our (scheming for) gain, there would be no thieves nor robbers. Those three methods (of government) Thought olden ways in elegance did fail And made these names their want of worth to veil; But simple views, and courses plain and true Would selfish ends and many lusts eschew.

In the highest antiquity, (the people) did not know that there were (their rulers). In the next age they loved them and praised them. In the next they feared them; in the next they despised them. Thus it was that when faith (in the Tao) was deficient (in the rulers) a want of faith in them ensued (in the people). How irresolute did those (earliest rulers) appear, showing (by their reticence) the importance which they set upon their words! Their work was done and their undertakings were successful, while the people all said, 'We are as we are, of ourselves!'

The Analects of Confucius

When he entered the ancestral temple of the State, he asked about everything. When any of his friends died, if he had no relations who could be depended on for the necessary offices, he would say, 'I will bury him.' When a friend sent him a present, though it might be a carriage and horses, he did not bow. The only present for which he bowed was that of the flesh of sacrifice.

The Master said of Kung-ye Ch'ang that he might be wived; although he was put in bonds, he had not been guilty of any crime. Accordingly, he gave him his own daughter to wife. Of Nan Yung he said that if the country were well governed he would not be out of office, and if it were ill-governed, he would escape punishment and disgrace. He gave him the daughter of his own elder brother to wife.

Ch'an K'ang asked Po-yu, saying, 'Have you heard any lessons from your father different from what we have all heard?' Po-yu replied, 'No. He was standing alone once, when I passed below the hall with hasty steps, and said to me, "Have you learned the Odes?" On my replying "Not yet," he added, "If you do not learn the Odes, you will not be fit to converse with." I retired and studied the Odes. 'Another day, he was in the same way standing alone, when I passed by below the hall with hasty steps, and said to me, 'Have you learned the rules of Propriety?' On my replying 'Not yet,' he added, 'If you do not learn the rules of Propriety, your character cannot be established.' I then retired, and learned the rules of Propriety. 'I have heard only these two things from him.' Ch'ang K'ang retired, and, quite delighted, said, 'I asked one thing, and I have got three things. I have heard about the Odes. I have heard about the rules of Propriety. I have also heard that the superior man maintains a distant reserve towards his son.'

The Meaning of the Glorious Koran

One of the two women said: O my father! Hire him! For the best (man) that thou canst hire in the strong, the trustworthy. He said: Lo! I fain would marry thee to one of these two daughters of mine on condition that thou hirest thyself to me for (the term of) eight pilgrimages. Then if thou completest ten it will be of thine own accord, for I would not make it hard for thee. Allah willing, thou wilt find me of the righteous.

And give unto the women (whom ye marry) free gift of their marriage portions; but if they of their own accord remit unto you a part thereof, then ye are welcome to absorb it (in your wealth). Give not unto the foolish (what is in) your (keeping of their) wealth, which Allah hath given you to maintain; but feed and clothe them from it, and speak kindly unto them.

And if ye wish to exchange one wife for another and ye have given unto one of them a sum of money (however great), take nothing from it. Would ye take it by the way of calumny and open wrong? How can ye take it (back) after one of you hath gone in unto the other, and they have taken a strong pledge from you?

The Japji

Priceless are Thine attributes, O God, and priceless Thy dealings; Priceless Thy dealers, priceless Thy storehouses; Priceless what cometh from Thee, and priceless what is taken away; Priceless Thy rate and priceless the time for dealing; Priceless Thy justice and priceless Thy court; Priceless Thy weights and priceless Thy measures; Priceless Thy gifts and priceless Thy marks; Priceless Thy mercy and priceless Thine ordinances. How beyond all price Thou art cannot be stated. Ever speaking of Thee men continue to fix their thoughts on Thee. They who read the Veds and Purans speak of Thee; Learned men speak of Thee and deliver discourses on Thee; Brahmas speak of Thee, and Indars speak of Thee; The milkmaids and Krishan speak of Thee Shivs speak of Thee, the Sidhs speak of Thee; All the Budhas Thou hast created speak of Thee; The demons speak of Thee, the gods speak of Thee; Thy demigods, men, munis, and servants speak of Thee; How many speak of Thee or attempt to speak of Thee! How many depart while speaking of Thee! If Thou wert to create as many more as Thou hast created, Even then few of them would be able to speak adequately of Thee. Thou mayest be as great as Thou pleasest. Nanak, only the True One Himself knoweth how great He is. If any one were to speak improperly of God, Write him down as the most ignorant of men.

Make contentment and modesty thine earrings, self-respect thy wallet, meditation the ashes to smear on thy body; Make thy body, which is only a morsel for death, thy beggar's coat, and faith thy rule of life and thy staff. Make association with men thine Ai Panth, and the conquest of thy heart the conquest of the world. Hail! Hail to Him, The primal, the pure, without beginning, the indestructible, the same in every age!

Pilgrimage, austerities, mercy, and almsgiving on general and special occasions Whosoever performeth, may obtain some little honour; But he who heareth and obeyeth and loveth God in his heart, Shall wash off his impurity in the place of pilgrimage within him. All virtues are Thine, O Lord; none are mine. There is no devotion without virtue. From the Self-existent proceeded Maya (athi), whence issued a word which produced Brahma and the rest- 'Thou art true, Thou art beautiful, there is ever pleasure in Thy heart!' What the time, what the epoch, what the lunar day, and what the week-day, What the season, and what the month when the world was created, The Pandits did not discover; had they done so, they would have recorded it in the Purans. Nor did the Qazis discover it; had they done so, they would have recorded it in the Quran: Neither the Jogi nor any other mortal knows the lunar day, or the week-day, or the season, or the month. Only the Creator who fashioned the world knoweth when He did so. How shall I address Thee, O God? how shall I praise Thee? how shall I describe Thee? and how shall I know Thee? Saith Nanak, everybody speaketh of Thee, one wiser than another. Great is the Lord, great is His name; what He doeth cometh to pass. Nanak, he who is proud shall not be honoured on his arrival in the next world.

World English Bible

Purchase and Dowry

As civilization progressed, fathers did not like to appear to sell their daughters, and so, while continuing to accept the bride purchase price, they initiated the custom of giving the pair valuable presents which about equaled the purchase money. And upon the later discontinuance of payment for the bride, these presents became the bride’s dowry.

83:3.3

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